W31D6 – sunset

I’m watching a beautiful sunset, which is the sunset of my Life so far.

Looking back on the Day brings satisfaction and contentment. I think of all the activities enjoyed and rites of passage experienced which can only come during the daytime. There’s plenty to look back on and smile about, and mine feels like a typical Day. It’s happy, carefree, and full of memories.

Even so I can feel the sun going down. Much as I love the Day and all its joys, something else itches inside of me. I yearn for something that can’t be found in spur-of-the-moment adventures and gossiping with girlfriends. There has to be something more, and I know where it is.

The Night. Full of different joys, harder than the daytime but more enriching. One-way ticket only. I yearn to visit, know there’s no way I can’t not live there. Fearing it, feeling apprehensive of the unknown, feels irrelevant to what I’m sure is my Fate. The Day will finish and I will go to the Night. That’s how it is.

And right now, at 32 weeks pregnant with my first child, here’s the Sunset. The inevitable link between two such different worlds. Beautiful because of its fleeting nature. It’s a celebration of all the color and energy of the Day, mingled with the the vibrancy and mystery of the upcoming Night. The gods must have designed it to grab the attention, compel one to savor what has been and ponder what’s to come.

I’m watching the sunset, and I’m feeling baby girl’s kicks, and I’m reflecting on what Life has been so far.

And I wonder what joys and challenges the Night will bring.

KK 21jan19